It was in the Fall of 2002 and I was a student at Western Illinois University. I was still settling into being on campus and I was trying to find places to meet people. I was a loner at the time and wanted to find some way to get out of my shell. So I went to as many parties as I could in an attempt to meet people, especiallly women, but the only thing that resulted from it, aside from meeting lot of cool guys and receiving an invitation to pledge from two fraternities, was the constant feeling of being left out from the group, likely resulting from the lack of companionship. So I just tried as hard as I could to talk to women. I was doing so most of the time, but the result was the same, It would begin with a nice conversation and then end with either with the woman heading off someplace (i.e. her dorm; the bathroom; with her friends; etc) or with the woman telling me that I was nice and wanting to be friends with me. Needless to say, it frustrated me. So I started looking to the Internet for ways to attract women which resulted in me discovering the seduction community. Within a couple days, I was spending my free time snatching techniques, such as openers, transitions etc. from a site called DatingClass.com and to my dire shock, not only did it make a lot of sense to me, it worked to some extent.
A couple weeks later, I went to a party that I heard about eavesdropping on a conversation. There I met this particular lady (come to think of it, it was during a Halloween Party). She was a pretty slender lady dresses as an Island girl, who I found out was dragged out of her dorm room by her friends to be at this party. She wasn't bored by any means but was a bit of a wallflower so I approached her. Next thing I know, we ended up talking for pretty much most of the party and found that we had a shitload in common. She was an introverted interlectual free spirit who was into art and poetry and was a little jaded of the social scene. I was obviously into her so I used a few lines that I've been studying for days on her. She was more receptive than I thought. The problem was that I was enjoying the conversation so much that I didn't notice the IOIs she was giving me. Basically I was flying blind and winging it at the same time. At the end of the party, I ask her if we can continue our conversation somehow, which is basically "Pickup Speak" for "May I have your number" Surprisingly, she was excited about that and promptly gave me her number. Yes, it was a number close. Unfortunately, the victory was short lived. Me being a total cynic at the time, I called her, heard another voice, hung up and dismissed the number as a fake. I also figured out not too long afterwards that every gesture that I saw from her at the party was an IOI. Had I noticed it and took it further I would been making out with her on the spot. I didn't see her for about two months until I saw her at a party at the same place we met. Unlike last time, it was different. She was happy to see me, but those same IOIs that I saw before were not there. She was distant, almost distracted, but by the end of the party, I was somehow able to get her number again. I wanted to make up for my passiveness so badly, so I called her. I arranged a lunch with her that she agreed to, which really had me excited. That was until a couple days later. On the day we were supposed to meet up, She never showed up. My spirit was deflated immediately. I never saw her again after that.
Not long after that, going into the start of 2003, I made a promise to swear off women for an entire year until I could find out why was I so bad with women. That was when I started my research on the techniques of the Pick Up Artist. Surprisingly, it was from that research that I was able to find out my problems with three to four months, then spent the rest of that year studying every tip, trick and technique I could hoping that when I'm ready to approach women again, I would be armed to the teeth with the stuff I'd studied. What I didn't count on was that in the years that followed was that my inability to communicate my needs to people would actually be the reason that my pickup skills would be hampered as badly as it is. I would be in the presence of a woman that I like, and because I could never really say what is on my mind, instead, I would either show my affection physically which scared them off or avoided being affectionate with her which made her think I wasn't interested in her. After mid-2005, I studied pickup on and off for a good while, but approached virtually no one and the Coup de Grace happened when I took a job on a cruise ship in Hawaii and spent a year and a half there doing more studying than approaching. In fact, the whole time I was there, I didn't have sex with not one woman. I was still to busy figuring out how to approach. I realized that all I've done was study the material and not applied it. To make things worse, I never truly learned how to communicate which rendered everything moot.
Before long, I was to admit to myself that I could no longer learn pickup all by myself. That in order to truly embrace what I learned, I need to be taught by someone who knows it well. But because there was no one that I could find that was willing to teach me, I lost my motivation for pickup as a result. As far as I was concerned, I was a lost cause on my own. And thus my decision to try to be on The Pick Up Artist.


Comments
Posted April 22, 2008 7:03 PM
NoMan said:
Try going to a workshop for PUA skills if you don't get on this show. I know that's what I'd need if I don't get on. Shop around, the best are expensive but some good guys run much cheaper ones.
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